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Breaking Free of Skinny Ideals: Embracing Health and Happiness.

Once in my life, I was skinny.

Truly, the only time. It was back when affording meals was a challenge for me. Weighing in at 98 pounds and standing 5’7”, my appearance screamed anything but health. The skinniness wasn't a sign of fitness, but a testimony to struggles. While I was grateful for the shelter over my head, nourishment took a backseat. Jump to the present: I may not align with the societal definition of "skinny," but health radiates from me.

Ask yourself, how do you perceive your present self? Is your description brimming with positivity, or do you dwell in negativity regarding your looks and feels? It's natural to spot flaws when you face the mirror. Some imperfections won't vanish, even with weight loss. Every time I notice my neck, I’m initially disheartened. But then, I reflect: I lost 65 pounds 23 years ago, quit smoking 15 years ago, and hail from an era pre-SPF 50. Considering all that, I'm fortunate.

Chasing after "skinny" isn't on my agenda. Instead, I yearn to be strong, spirited, and vivacious, without getting fixated on the scale's digits. Should a number have the power to define us? A past incident lingers in my memory. A salesgirl, convinced I was smaller than I claimed, insisted I fit into sizes 7 or 9 jeans, refusing to believe I was a size 11. Although her intention might’ve been to compliment, it made me feel misjudged. Memories like these craft our self-perception. What are the limiting beliefs chaining you down?

Memories like these craft our self-perception. What are the limiting beliefs chaining you down? Some common ones include:

  • "I'll never look as good as I used to." Comparing our current selves to past versions can be a disheartening trap, leading us to feel that our best days are behind us.

  • "My value is tied to my weight." Society often reinforces the notion that thinner is better, but it's essential to remember that our worth isn't determined by a number on a scale.

  • "People will only accept/love me if I'm in a certain shape." Seeking external validation can be limiting. True acceptance starts from within.

  • "It's too late for me to get healthy or change." Age is often used as an excuse, but it's never too late to prioritize health and happiness.

  • "If I can't be perfect, there's no point in trying." Perfectionism can paralyze our progress. Small steps can lead to significant changes.

Reflect on these beliefs. Are any of them echoing in your thoughts?

Identifying these limiting beliefs is just the first step. Next, it's about challenging and replacing them. Here are some tools to tackle these narratives head-on:

  • Self-awareness Journaling: Taking a moment each day to write down your thoughts can help you identify recurring patterns and beliefs. Once you're aware, you can start to challenge and reframe them.

  • Affirmations: Use positive, present-tense statements to replace those limiting beliefs. For instance, swap "I'll never look as good as I used to" with "I am becoming the best version of myself each day."

  • Educate Yourself: Sometimes, understanding the illogical nature of our beliefs can help. For instance, read about the misconceptions tied to weight or the fallacies of perfectionism. Knowledge can be empowering.

  • Seek Professional Guidance: Speaking to a counselor or a coach (like,Coach Paris!) can offer valuable insights. They can help provide strategies tailored to individual challenges.

  • Mindfulness and Meditation: By practicing mindfulness, you can become more in tune with your thoughts and feelings. Meditation can help in grounding you and preventing you from spiraling into negative thought patterns.

  • Surround Yourself with Positivity: Engage in communities (virtual or physical) that uplift and inspire. Avoid environments that perpetuate unhealthy standards or comparisons.

  • Set Realistic Goals: Instead of striving for perfection, aim for progress. Celebrate the small victories along the way.

By arming ourselves with these tools, we can begin to replace limiting beliefs with empowering ones, guiding us towards genuine health and happiness.

Turning the Mirror's Reflection into Positivity

1. Ditch the Scale: If it doesn't serve you positively, throw it out. If you keep it, remember it's only there to provide data. It shouldn't define your worth.

2. No Comparisons: Remember, everyone's journey is unique. Define your health and fitness goals by what feels right for you, not what you perceive to be right for others.

3. Mirror Appreciation: Those legs? They're your pillars of strength. Laugh lines? They're testimony to a life well-lived with joy. Saggy skin? It's a badge of your health journey, signaling triumph over the risks of being overweight.

This is merely scratching the surface. Overcoming limiting beliefs is an ongoing process, and they might challenge you time and again. However, the tools and strategies I've shared are here to help you navigate this journey.

Should you seek further guidance, I offer both Coaching sessions and Support Groups, providing a safe space where members truly grasp the emotions you're experiencing.

Join us for a complimentary Virtual Open House on October 26th at 7PM:

Or, if you prefer a direct session, book a time to chat with me, Coach Paris:

For those interested in our Weekly Support Groups, learn more here:

Not quite set for coaching yet, but eager to kickstart your journey to better health? Dive into my book "Always On Your Side: Power of 13" and its companion workbook. Grab your copies here.

To echo my initial sentiment: I might not align with "skinny," but health? That's my vibe.

Always On Your Side,

~Coach Paris

Progress not Perfection.


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